＠中文評語修改版本：
原文：
Ted, you can talk more to your friends, and smile all the time that makes you feel kindly. Or you can play basketball with your classmates that is easier to make friend. I always talk more to others when we first met, I think that the gay will think you are good to more friends, and you will be succeed. If you go to a new place, you just need to have fun and do you best, it will make you join the team quickly and easy.
建議：
Ted, I have two suggestions for you to make some friends at your new school. Firstly, you should interact as much as you can with your classmates, which will make the others feel that you want to be a friend of them. Secondly, you can also join them doing sports, such as basketball. In my case, I always try to talk to people when we first met. The one who you are talking to will know that you are friendly, and you will have a high chance to be successful to make friends. When you just arrived in a new place, you should have fun with people. This will help you join them quickly and easily.
評語：
1.這篇作文是一篇建議文，一開始你可以直接就告訴對方你有「幾點」建議給他。所以在文章中使用第一（Firstly）、第二（Secondly）會使文章架構更有邏輯且清楚。
2.請注意英文副詞與形容詞的區別。比如最後的easy（形容詞）應該改為easily（副詞）。
3.在英文當中，如果兩個句子沒有透過連接詞連接，那就必須要用「句號」隔開。比如原文第三句 I think that 前面應該改為句號。
＠英文評語修改版本：
句子Ａ：
小時候，我和鄰居John同校。那時我們常一起打籃球，度過許多快樂時光。畢業以後，他和家人移居到國外。從此我們就失去連絡了。
Student's version:
When I was young, my neighbor, John was study the same school with me. At that time we often play basketball together, and having a great time. After we graduated, he and his family move abroad. Since then, we never connect with other again.
Teacher's first comment: Because it's about your childhood, you should use past tense instead of present tense in your translation. So the present tense in your original text could be changed to past tense like below:
When I was young, my neighbor, John was study (was studying) the same school with me. At that time we often play (played) basketball together, and having a great time. After we graduated, he and his family move (moved) abroad. Since then, we never connect (connected) with other again.
Teacher's second comment: Because it's about my early childhood, the idea being that when we were children, we were not fully grown (big). So here you should use "when I was little..." However, if I said, "when I was young...", I could be talking about the time of my youth ( for example when I was a teenager).
Teacher's version:
When I was little, my neighbor John and I were studying at the same school. And we shared a lot of great times throughout our relationship, for example playing basketball together after school. After we graduated, he and his family moved abroad. Since then, we lost the connection with each other completely.
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